Baronhawk's Nest

The lost generation
Bereft of direction
By life, disillusioned
In emotional starvation

Hoping for salvation
Dreams and inspirations
Searching for redemption
Journeying without destinations.

life
a fleeting dream
it flits
and flitters for a while

a faint
and vanishing whisper
scattered
by the breezy sky

memories
are not forever
it fades
and fails with time

footsteps
on sandy beaches
washed
by the waving tide

hope
is an illusion
it shrouds
and shadows existance

blinkers
enshrouding vision
eyelids
on unopened eyes

dreams
are but obstructions
that blocks
a restful slumber

boulders
raining from the heavens
burdens
on heavy shoulders

love
is an affliction
a disease
that leads to sorrow

a cancer
to a heart's emotion
a sickness
that bleeds the marrows

Oh how I wish,
I could disappear.

To go away,
far from here.

To leave all,
and everything behind.

To discard,
this sorry existance of mine.

For a new start,
to a new beginning.

For a different path,
from mine that's ending.

Oh how I wish,
I could disappear.

How I wish,
that it were...

With towering buildings all along,
In the hustle-bustle of city life,
And yet always I feel alone,
In the crowd and forest of people alive,

With tired steps I walked along,
Through arches and streets so full of life,
And yet always I am alone,
My heart unfeeling, devoid, unalive,

I've had families, friends and foes,
And yet always I feel alone,
Why? Why? Why? I asked along,
And yet no answer can be borne,

We cannot fight what fate have decreed,
What destiny says shall always borne,
Thus is my fate in this dismal creed,
Forever destined to remain alone,

I am the lonely one,
I am the lonely man.

@baronhawk poetry

copyright Hazlan Zakaria 2003

Like a dream
upon a dark slumber
Like a breeze
upon a hot summer

You bring to me
a spark of fire
To light my heart's
dying ember

Like a song
of sweet harmony
Like a picture
of infinite beauty

You have woken
inside of me
Love that I thought
was not to be

Like the sun
on the first of spring
Like the flower
as it starts blooming

You brought me hope
a new beginning
The warmth of love
to a heart that's freezing

In the palace of my mind,
there is a place that I reserve,
For a lady that have touched my soul,
and shown me what it is to love.

She was never mine to begin with,
and never did I manage to win her hand.
But forever will I keep her with me,
even though its just memories in my mind.

My heart was hollow and my soul was empty,
until the day she walked into my life.
Her presence brightens up my gloomy days,
She brings happiness and makes me so alive.

But fate has foretold and destiny decided,
she was not for me nor am I for her.
We are meant to walk on paths that diverged,
not to share our life beside the other.

It will be a garden of flowers free and wild,
this place that I reserve for she that I revere.
Where wildflowers grow and sway in the wind,
so beautiful and willful oh! just like her.

I will move on with my life that's for sure,
but I will always return to this place now and then.
To watch the wildflowers dance and sway,
and to remember the lady that holds my heart in her hand.

There I live upon a hill,
On which my castle stood.
Clad in armor of egoed steel,
Hiding in a dark hypocritic hood.

Indifferent walls surround my keep,
Keeping out things I do not want to meet.
Impassive towers guard my sleep,
Keeping me safe from reality's treat.

Sharp witted arrows arm my speech,
Cutting through emotions that rises near.
Catapults of humor keeps out of reach,
Any feelings that might try to appear.

No windows decorate my walls,
Nor are there doors to grace my keep.
I will be safe here in my halls,
For there are no entry to my sanctum deep.

There will I live upon a hill,
On which my castle stood.
For the world forever and always will,
Be a place that I have never understood.

I am a prisoner,
in the prison of the mind.
Shackled by fear,
and in doubts entwined.

Caged by emotions,
stormy and undefined.
Immobilized by inaction,
intrinsicly blind.

Chained by servitude,
by loyalty bound.
Waves of ineptitude,
hold me down.

Trapped by depression,
in coils of hate,
Separated from redemption,
by walls of fate.

Deep dark lamentable despair,
That sweet respite from terrible care,
A bottomless pit of blissful gloom,
Whose gentle darkness brings soothing doom,

Give up all hope all ye who enter,
Surrender your care to Lethe's decanter,
Throw out your dreams and unbridled ambition,
Drown your sorrows in the embrace of perdition,

Cloud your eyes with lenses of apathy,
Numb your hearts with uncaring tepidity,
Let the tides of emotions wash away forever,
Leave only cold numbness for our hearts to savor.